Sunday, 22 May 2016

Self compassion

From the early birth of Earth major religions, we learn that you must to suffer in order to be happy. Mistakes need to be punished, otherwise our children will be very spoiled, right? Whatever our sins are, we judge ourselves harsher than anyone else. Think about, if you friend make a mistake, you will remind him or her that she/he is only human. But if you are doing the same mistake, your first thought is "i am so stupid". Freud came later to say that humans are selfish, destructive and they need to control all these feelings. Behaviorism, some years later, make us believe in a system of punishment and reward. Then we start to study self esteem, this wonderful sentiment that we are better than average. Nobody told you that it is OK to be average. And, in the end, we learn that fierce competition is the best way to become successful and survive.

But then i will say something that will make you think about:
What if all these informations and beliefs are wrong?

Kristin Neff, from Texas University, tried to introduce a new concept, called self-compassion - queting one's inner critic and replace it with a voice of support, understanding and care. There are three main components of self-compassion:
1.Self kindness (vs. self judgement)
2.Common humanity (vs. isolation)
3.Mindfulness (vs. over-identification).

Think about it. What if we can be happy and live a vibrant, fulfilling life in the same time?

I will expand this very soon in a following post.

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