Kindness for children 101

Do you want your kid to be happy, altruistic and kind?

In a very interesting study about the altruistic tendencies in children, as an answer to the question is kindness a trait we are born with or we learn, the children meet a monkey toy and the experimenter give them 8 treats, give one treat to the monkey, the child found a treat and give it to the monkey and choose to give one of his/her own treat to the monkey. The result showed that the biggest increase in happiness was when the child sacrifice one of own treats and give it to the monkey.

While other studies have suggested adults are happier giving to others than to themselves and that kids are motivated to help others spontaneously, this is the first study to suggest that altruism is intrinsically rewarding even to very young kids, and that it makes them happier to give than to receive.

These findings complement recent studies that have shown that giving kids rewards for their prosocial behavior may actually undermine kindness. One possible explanation for these somewhat counterintuitive findings is that, in order for children to grow up seeing themselves as kind and giving, it is important for them to feel that they do good because they want to, not because others expect them to.

Of course, this does not diminish the importance of a loving and kind environment, in which adults teach the importance of prosocial behavior, including by modelling that behavior themselves. It merely suggests that nature may have given us a happy head-start in the task of raising kind kids.


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